Book Review- Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times - Katherine May
‘Life meanders like a path through the woods. We have seasons when we flourish, and seasons when the leaves fall from us, revealing our bare bones. Given time, they grow again.’
What’s it about?
Katherine May’s ‘Wintering’ is a memoir of sorts, detailing how she coped after suffering a few knockbacks in life, including illness and a change in employment. May looks at the power of rest and retreat to heal, as well as using the analogy of ‘wintering’ to deal with depression. It’s about drawing on the strength of winter to heal yourself.
When her husband becomes ill, the author realises that with her constant running around and worrying that she has neglected herself. By listening to her body, she realises that she has to undergo a period of ‘wintering’ in order to restore balance. Along with helping her son face anxiety, it’s a situation that many of us can relate to and it’s a familiar theme throughout this book - these are life events that we all face.
Winter Months
I read this thoughtful and wise book during the Great lockdown winter, that lasted from March 2020 until sometime after Easter 2021. Pandemic aside, it does feel like we are finally emerging into Spring; only today I noticed the afternoon light starting to fill the room in which I read, and there were a few more snowdrops on my morning walk and definitely more birdsong. Which reminded me today how I read in this book how the friendly Robin is the only bird that sings through the darkest winter months, amongst other interesting information on how animals and humans 'winter'.
Katherine May writes about her own experiences of wintering, including entertaining accounts of a visit to Stonehenge for the winter solstice, thermal pools and to see the Northern lights whilst heavily pregnant. The description of sea swimming during winter is simply beautiful and moving. I appreciate some of these options aren’t open to all of us during the current winter of financial discontent.
Natures rhythms
What I liked about ‘Wintering’ was the idea that we need to accept and adjust to our own rhythms in life – there will simply be times when we need to retreat, in order to heal and recover. Loss, and change, hope and love – life is ever changing.
Life is cyclical - each of us will face our own winters. That may be grief, illness, whatever live throws at us - but we can’t hide from it. It comes to each of us.
‘Wintering brings about some of the most profound and insightful moments of our human experience, and wisdom resides in those who have wintered.’
I also enjoyed the Katherine May’s writing style in this - it’s familiar and personal, and she is interesting and good company. It’s at times both beautiful and moving, and I like how the personal was interspersed with references to nature, literature and mythology.
Wintering Summary
‘Wintering’ allowed me to think of winter in a different way, seeing it as a time of rest, retreat and renewal, and that it's a time to care for ourselves. The author tells us to think of our lives as cyclical, and that there are times when we have to pare back to the essentials. Life ebbs and flows, simple as that. I’ve recommended this book to so many people and I'll keep this comforting book close by on the shelf for when the seasons, and life, inevitably changes again.
Winter is a time for retreat, a fallow period that gives us the opportunity to take stock, rest and regenerate. We can choose to see this time as a chance to heal, and can find great solace during these months.
Reading this book encouraged me to start taking cold showers. There’s that moment when I turn the dial to the coldest setting that I inwardly brace, almost crouching with fear. But facing that moment every day has allowed me to face fear every day and overcome it; I’ve found it a very powerful practice.
Book Recommendation
This is such an empathetic book - May has a great understanding for what it is to be human, how there are times when we can struggle and face burnout. There were so many times reading this book that it felt like a balm for my soul. I know that’s a cliche, and I try to avoid them, but that’s honestly how useful I found this book to be.
You’ll enjoy ‘wintering’ if you enjoy memoir, self help books, travel or nature writing - it’s an invitation to rest and reassess. Katherine May says it best herself;
“But here it is: my winter. It’s an open invitation to transition into a more sustainable life and to wrest back control over the chaos I’ve created. It’s a moment when I have to step into solitude and contemplation. It’s also a moment when I have to walk away from old alliances, let the strings of some friendships fall loose, if only for awhile. It’s a path I’ve walked over and over again in my life. I have learned the skill set of wintering the hard way.”
Book review - Wintering by Katherine May
241 pages
Published November 10th 2020 by Riverhead Books
How can you mentally survive the winter?
Reading books like this help certainly, but there’s no doubting it can be struggle. Resistance to anything in life can cause inner turmoil, so as this book so beautifully highlighted, it’s best to embrace it. Saying that, here in the Northern Hemisphere there are a few things that I do.
One of the first things I do on awakening is to turn on my Sun Lamp. I perch it on a stack of books so that’s in my eyeline. I find that this really helps me with my mood during these times, or at the least stops it from dropping completely through the floor.
So obvious, but movement. Wrap up, go for a walk and get the blood flowing. Sure, there’s a brand new season of ‘Below deck’ to be enjoyed under the duvet whilst lingering on the couch but five minutes won’t hurt you. Add on another five minutes the next day and keep going.
I like to keep a few days leave for the Christmas period. There are a few days between Stephen's day and New Years when you gorge on crap tv, alcohol and chocolate, but what about doing something that feels renewing? I love to do a meditative retreat during this period, and although I have attended in person in the past, I like home retreats where you follow the schedule online. Turn the tv and phone off and devote some sweet sweet time to your loving self.
Keeping warm can be a problem at times, especially if you live in a draughty home. Weighted blankets can be a great comfort. Activate rest mode.
Lift the phone. People tend to hunker down during this period and spend all their time with family indoors. But some of us live alone, so it’s important not just to wait for others to get in contact, but to lift the phone ourselves and arrange to meet up. We’re social animals after all.
Lie on your couch, with your sun lamp blaring, weighted blanket on (red cheeked after you’ve come back from a bracing walk), in between phone calls to some friends and family. Now it’s time to check out a book blog, pick up some recommendations and disappear.