Set it and Forget it: Are you Ready to Transform your Sleep? by Daniel Erichsen

Some of my fave books to read when I wake up in the early hours are books about sleep and insomnia, which in turn tell me why I’m waking up in the early hours to read books about sleep and insomnia. ‘Set it and forget it: Are you ready to transform your sleep' by Daniel Erichsen is a great book to help break that cycle. 

Insomnia Rabbit Holes

I’ve had sleep problems for years but currently I have sleep maintenance insomnia, which means I wake up too early and can't drop off again. So the question I’m constantly asking myself is ‘How can I sleep through the night?’ I think this one many people will be familiar with.

After I awaken at 3: 33 or 4:44 am I fire up the laptop and crank up the ol’ google machine. I've convinced myself that there is one single thing I can do to improve my sleep, and godhelpme I was going to find it on the interweb. Invariably I end up on reddit /insomnia, perhaps the biggest warren of rabbit holes on the internet and that's saying something. The cast of ‘Watership down’ couldn't find their way out of this place.

But recently I got lucky on this nocturnal deep dive. Clicking thread after thread looking for this magic formula, I saw the name ‘thesleepcoach’ popping up a couple of times. By 5:55 I'd watched a couple of his youtube videos, ordered his book and already started to feel that there may be light at the end of the tunnel. But this isn’t the first time I've got my hopes up about an insomnia ‘cure’.

Sleep Hygiene And Hyper Arousal

‘Set it and forget it’ is divided into short easy to digest chapters with nice illustrations. Titles include ‘What is normal sleep?’ and ‘The gas and the brake’ and ‘The sleep hygiene trap’. This one in particular I found particular interesting as sleep hygiene is something I obsess over.

What I realised in this book was that all the things I was doing to help with my sleep (watching my diet/sleep mask/ear plugs/camomile tea/medication/Yoga Nidra etc etc etc) were actually hindering my ability to sleep. It’s all about sleep effort, and Daniel does a great job of explaining this in an easy and concise manner - even my bleary sleep deprived brain could decipher it. It's also evidence based, and the 'gas and brake '(video at end of post) is such an easy to undertand analogy, because there's nothing really complicated about this.

Reading about the symptoms of hyperarousal has also been comforting to me, as I didn't know what they were and they were causing me a bit of concern. Adrenaline rushes, hypnic jerks, twitching badly before I fell asleep - I was having them all. It's good to know what they are and this has set my mind at ease.

Sleep Windows and Effort

One of the things I liked about 'Set it and forget' it is that it doesn't spoon feed you. It certainly makes suggestions about sleep windows which I've found really useful so far, but it's more about what you shouldn't be doing. It's about a falling away of these strutures and concepts you believe you need to get a good nights sleep. I found the whole book quite intuitive - I felt I knew what Daniel was writing to be true, and I just needed him to nudge me in that direction.

You need to drop the effort. Sleep is a natural process, so really the best we can do is get out of the way and let it happen. This book is about regaining confidence in your natural ability which is to sleep; you know this and you got this.

I should say that this is one of the shorter sleep books about sleep and insomnia I've read, but none the less efficient for that. It doesn't have to be any longer - it contains all the understanding you need to get a good nights sleep. Any longer and I think it would have become a bit repetitive.

Sleep restriction therapy and CBTi

Perhaps you feel the need for more instruction, to practise sleep restriction therapy, to learn all the hygiene tips that will guarantee you  a good nights sleep. I’ve been there, read them all, and there are other books out there that will do that for you - this isn't really that book. I'm going to compile a list in another post as I've read a few.

(I enjoy reading books about sleep and insomnia. It's an interesting subject and also dovetails nicely with my interest in non-duality and meditation. Watching thoughts arise regarding my beliefs about sleep has been instructive.)

I've read a lot and practiced CBTi (cognitive behaviour therapy for insomnia) before and there are certainly elements of that theory in this book. But it's slightly different from that therapy in that it's much more relaxed and intuitive. I'd say it's a falling away, about enhancing your understanding of hyperarousal and just letting sleep happen.

Summary

I enjoyed this boook so much that I was happy to turn the lights on and reach for it at 4.44 am. Is it the cure for my insomnia? It's too early to say, because there are no miracle cures or quick fixes. If you're like me and are looking for that one single thing that will transform your sleep, I have a breaking newsflash for you - it doesn't exist.

My own definition of insomnia is that it’s not being able to sleep well and is mostly caused by a fear of not being able to sleep well.

It's about reframing your experience, doing a bit of self-enquiry about your thoughts and accepting that you won't sleep well every night and if you get a bad nights sleep, it's not the end of the world.

Example

Here’s an example. A few nights after finishing this book and watching some of the videos, I went to bed. Two hours later I was woken by a really noisy car - there were some boy racers tearing around the town I live, making a racket. Really annoying, and after 15 minutes I just got up, because sleep wasn’t coming anytime soon.

Normally I’d be fuming, cursing the boy racers and getting myself into a rage spiral. I’d be thinking about tomorrow, and all the things that were now ruined because I’d be so tired and lethargic. And what about the impact on my health of another night of disrupted sleep?

This time, I was mildly annoyed, because yeah, I wanted a nights sleep. No one likes waking up that early. I got up, watched some tv and read a book. I accepted that this had happened, and it was out of my control.

Normally I’d have practiced Yoga Nidra, listened to the most boring audiobook I could find, meditated etc - all the time fretting that I wasn't falling asleep. What was wrong with me!!

This time around I waited until I was sleepy, went back to bed, and fell asleep. Next day I did all I had intended to do and I didn’t keel over. I don’t think anyone remarked that looked tired, even if I might have felt it. I just didn't make a big deal out of it and to me this was a breakthrough.

Relaxed

I'm much more informed about what was causing my insomnia and relaxed about not getting a perfect nights sleep. I have noticed that I have abandoned all the things I was doing that I thought were helping my sleep, and without them I'm sleeping......exactly the same. 

I've only finished the book a few days but already my attitude has changed, as per the example above. This morning I think I slept a bit longer and whilst I'm happy about that, because it’s important to accentuate the positives, I don't really care too much. As this book points out, that is more than half the battle. This might just be the book that improves my sleep. Thanks Daniel and the sleep coach team!

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255 Pages - Published June 24, 2020